[current mood : confuse ]
[music maybe i'm amazed by jem]
[music maybe i'm amazed by jem]
my blog has been silent for quite some time now...a lot of thoughts are running in my mind..how i wish i could write it all here without missing any detail..but i don't think it will happen.. unless i shut this blog down and secure a private account..so i'll just keep wishing coz it ain't gonna happen...
the sem is over..but does it have to end that way??? why,why,why me of all people? i kept thinking about what happened.. i admit..its my fault, that's what i got for being so "sigurista"..if i could only turn back time..hell! i will still do it ..but i'll be more careful and for once acknowledge some warnings..if you know what i mean..or better yet s-t-u-d-y...you can't expect things to turn out the way you want them to be..hay..enough already, what's done is done..regrets are useless..all i can do is hope for the best even if the best is still the worst.. yeah like i have a choice..omg! the thought of facing that freakin gay director again scares the hell out of me..wahh...i'm pretty sure God must have some reasons for doing all these..maybe it's a sign.. i don't know..but i'm gonna figure that out sooner..who knows maybe this incident will lead me to the path of righteousness..yeah right..hehe..i'll leave this thing for now coz this isn't helping my sinking self-esteem..
so anyway, if i'll sum up my 3rd year 1st semester in one word, it will be "WORTHLESS".. a clear waste of money, time and effort..when i recieved my class schedule last june..i envisioned my self to be really productive, thinking that 5 major subjects will keep me busy enough not to idle..but guess what? to my rejoice none of it was worth the time..high grades without much effort..things turned out easy..basically, because the teachers don't give a damn if you learn anything, as long as they are doing their job its all good..i was actually enjoying this set up at first..but when things get old..they become boring..that's when i realized how lame things are..i'm paying for what?? a fast internet connection everyday(w/c by the way i'd be willing to trade for a good and sound sleep!) or perhaps for the teachers who rarely show up? you gotta be kidding me..those were not worth the 5 digit tuition we pay..my minor subjects were ok though (philo & theo).. way better in fact! if i rate my self according to what i learned on each major subject..i don't deserve to pass..esp. os and cisco..i can't totally excuse myself for that matter because maybe if i'm interested to learn, it will somehow help..but my level of interest is low..these whole thing leaves me uncertain and doubtful..game time is almost over.. i need to do something before i end up in regret again...
even though most of the time fate refuses to take my side, i still live my life according to what i think is right..i've made some ..well..stupid decisions along the way..we all do..the important thing is we learn from them..here's a short survey i got from our project document.. it's like a semester evaluation..hehe..=)
What went right?
1. My grandma is no longer strict with curfews..(yipee!)
2. Grades are ok..(except for that 68 in philo..)
3. Less movie marathon (less gastos..hehe)
4. Party galore
5. I manage to resolve differences from the past
6. I made some changes for the better
What went wrong?
1. Final Exam sux big time.. (T_T)
2. 68-philo midterm
3. 47%-final exam in cisco (grade pani!)
4. I lost half of my hanky (wah...some things never change!)
5. My monitor is not working well..(i badly need a new one..)
6. I commit another offense (no cs! yey! letter of apology was enough!)
Lessons learned
the sem is over..but does it have to end that way??? why,why,why me of all people? i kept thinking about what happened.. i admit..its my fault, that's what i got for being so "sigurista"..if i could only turn back time..hell! i will still do it ..but i'll be more careful and for once acknowledge some warnings..if you know what i mean..or better yet s-t-u-d-y...you can't expect things to turn out the way you want them to be..hay..enough already, what's done is done..regrets are useless..all i can do is hope for the best even if the best is still the worst.. yeah like i have a choice..omg! the thought of facing that freakin gay director again scares the hell out of me..wahh...i'm pretty sure God must have some reasons for doing all these..maybe it's a sign.. i don't know..but i'm gonna figure that out sooner..who knows maybe this incident will lead me to the path of righteousness..yeah right..hehe..i'll leave this thing for now coz this isn't helping my sinking self-esteem..
so anyway, if i'll sum up my 3rd year 1st semester in one word, it will be "WORTHLESS".. a clear waste of money, time and effort..when i recieved my class schedule last june..i envisioned my self to be really productive, thinking that 5 major subjects will keep me busy enough not to idle..but guess what? to my rejoice none of it was worth the time..high grades without much effort..things turned out easy..basically, because the teachers don't give a damn if you learn anything, as long as they are doing their job its all good..i was actually enjoying this set up at first..but when things get old..they become boring..that's when i realized how lame things are..i'm paying for what?? a fast internet connection everyday(w/c by the way i'd be willing to trade for a good and sound sleep!) or perhaps for the teachers who rarely show up? you gotta be kidding me..those were not worth the 5 digit tuition we pay..my minor subjects were ok though (philo & theo).. way better in fact! if i rate my self according to what i learned on each major subject..i don't deserve to pass..esp. os and cisco..i can't totally excuse myself for that matter because maybe if i'm interested to learn, it will somehow help..but my level of interest is low..these whole thing leaves me uncertain and doubtful..game time is almost over.. i need to do something before i end up in regret again...
even though most of the time fate refuses to take my side, i still live my life according to what i think is right..i've made some ..well..stupid decisions along the way..we all do..the important thing is we learn from them..here's a short survey i got from our project document.. it's like a semester evaluation..hehe..=)
What went right?
1. My grandma is no longer strict with curfews..(yipee!)
2. Grades are ok..(except for that 68 in philo..)
3. Less movie marathon (less gastos..hehe)
4. Party galore
5. I manage to resolve differences from the past
6. I made some changes for the better
What went wrong?
1. Final Exam sux big time.. (T_T)
2. 68-philo midterm
3. 47%-final exam in cisco (grade pani!)
4. I lost half of my hanky (wah...some things never change!)
5. My monitor is not working well..(i badly need a new one..)
6. I commit another offense (no cs! yey! letter of apology was enough!)
Lessons learned
1. Everybody has issues
2. Broken trust is irreparable
3. Change is inevitable might as well go with the flow
4. The truth will set you free
5. Being civil is not necessarily being plastic
6. Our judgements can be wrong
7. Keeping your problems to your self do more harm than good
8. Promises are meant to be broken
9. Being alone is not that bad
10. Friends come and go
11. A listening ear helps a friend in need
12. Don't take your friends for granted
13. Your big mouth can get you in trouble
14. Some things are better left unsaid
15. Chocolates indeed cures depression
16. Physical attraction is not enough
17. Relationship entails deep commitment
18. Choosing friendship over love makes you a winner!
19. Being single is fun!
20. Love has its time
21. Cheating is not a big deal, getting caught is!
